Love is sweet when it becomes a bond between two grown adults coming together to form a relationship and having the mindset of being a potential couple.
But along the way, things aren’t what we thought they could be.
After a breakup, you might suddenly notice a regular and consistent posting on social media from your ex; you may wonder why is my ex posting so much on social media.
Misunderstanding is inevitable in everyday life, so as it could be between two aspiring couples. Things may so fall apart, be irreparable, and the last resort could be a breakup.
The aftermath of a breakup can be so confusing. Every act of your ex becomes sensitive and penetrating. It is typical for you to be curious about how your ex is faring and coping after the breakup and vice-versa.
You unknowingly become a stalker, even though not for wanting them back but probably for knowing how well they are coping without you.
Now you are both apart, and it is now close to impossible to have frequent and flexible communication. However, social media remains the best tool to measure and understand how well your ex is doing.
Generally, whether or not they still have an attraction for you, or they have moved on to another relationship, feel remorseful of the breakup, or still see you as betraying the relationship, you can filter all these through their social media post.
Fundamentally, a breakup largely determines and answers why you think your ex has changed in the way he flirts on social media after the split.
If your ex flirt on social media on an average day, you’re not expected to be bothered about his post on social media after the breakup.
Is your ex posting too much after the breakup? or has that been his norm since you’ve known him?
Have the kinds of stuff he used to post recently changed? Is the post seems directional to you or relatable to relationship issues?
You are still in pain of seeing your ex making fun of the breakup and indirectly rubbing it to your face making it hurt your feeling.
Your ex posting too often than usual on social media has lots of reasons.
Here are a few salient reasons to the question of why is my ex posting so much on social media
1. He/She feels empty
Your ex’s sudden consistent post on social media can be because they are grieving about their incompetence to make the relationship work, so they want companionship and engagement to get back to their feet.
Your ex may be grief due to the anger, denial, depression, and frustration caused by the breakup. If your ex is the cause of the separation or it’s out of mutual understanding, they may still be feeling empty because of the dilemma of either taking the wrong decision.
Looking for a way to get themselves engaged can make them stay online more than necessary and post so much than usual.
2. To boost self-confidence and self-esteem
Your ex is probably posting so much on social media either to boost his self-esteem. For a relationship that is especially broken up out of low self-esteem.
Suppose your ex is an introvert who doesn’t have so much confidence to make himself clear in public or is someone who hardly opens up to people or finds it difficult to engage in lengthy conversation online and offline.
He might want to build on himself before venturing into another relationship or before seeking reconciliation between both of you, at least.
He is unusually making intelligent posts for engagement, posting funny memes for people to see the funny side of him, or discussing socio-political trending issues to have his self-esteem retraced.
3. Moving on to the next catch
After break up, most people post to social media to move on and search for another partner after their relationship has been at loggerhead or in a complicated state.
They may be posting relationship and romantic stuff to attract the opposite sex’s attention. Your ex is probably posting so much on social media to rebrand himself for another romantic challenge and moving on entirely to another relationship.
4. To gain control of the breakup
Many people can break up deliberately and still go ahead to rub it over your face intentionally.
They may be posting so much on social media to make you feel guilty and remorseful about the relationship or make you feel bitter and let guilty conscience bite you.
Your ex may be posting a random girl or guy as a friend with a romantic and erotic caption for you to feel bad and jealous to have them back.
5. To alleviate their guilt
A relationship that breaks up out of mutual understanding or from your ex incompetent attitude will make them feel guilty and suffers from a guilty conscience.
He might make social media his comfort zone in moving on and not giving enough thought to the breakup.
6. To Seek your attention
Do you even know why your ex is still seeking your attention after you have both parted ways? It is ironic to say.
Your ex is still trying to get your attention from their sudden posting to attract you. But think of it, you are most probably their priority when your love and attraction are hot and exciting. You are the person they easily relate to before the relationship goes sour.
The memory of you both having a night walk together, the crazy sex and naughty talks, attending parties, and many other romantic affairs cannot easily be snuffed out after the breakup.
With this, there is a high chance of craving your attention but maybe as mere friends.
Maybe, your sudden ex posting on social media is close to having the intention of getting you back in their life but doesn’t know the way to settle out the rift with you.
Using social media to grab your attention may be the only way they know best. The content they post will be different from what they used to when they want your attention.
In essence, they might be seeking your attention either to make them feel loved and accepted again or to let you see how well they are doing after the breakup without you.
How do you know whether your ex is seeking your attention or merely using social media to catch away boredom? You may be asking:
Is he trying to get my attention on social media
He may have left your world indeed, but still ghosting you in the online sphere.
He might have stopped contacting from all communication forms, but he does not stop coming your way online. Is he intentionally doing this to have your attention, or are you just overreacting to the aftermath of the breakup?
Of all the reasons we earlier stated about why is my ex posting so much on social media, some of the reasons may get to you with time if you don’t have tough skin.
It can be agonizing to be in such a dilemma and devise what all those signs mean.
But why are you still so worried about them and having concern for what they feel about you. You are probably not convinced enough to let them go.
It is not subtlety to say you both want each other attention. The feeling you had for them may not have faded entirely but for any reason, not convinced yet.
Do not think they are trying to get your attention until you have made a perfect study of their unusual habit on social media and master some strange signs to arrive at your conclusion.
Here are the signs you can rely genuinely on that he wants your attention and engagement on social media after the breakup
Signs your ex is trying to get your attention on social media
Before delving into that, be aware that the reason for trying to get your attention may not be that they desire to get you back into their lives or want to be in an ordinary friendship relationship with you.
Instead, they may be using the post to make you feel sad about the incident, make you feel guilty, or fake that they are doing better without you.
That being said, some signs exhibit he is badly in need of your attention for any of the stated reasons.
1. He posts more selfies and pictures in fascinating locations
Most people don’t love taking pictures except on some special occasions. If your ex suddenly turns to a selfie-and picture freak, they are most likely doing that to let you see the new beauty and attraction in them.
Moreso, if they made a post in a more beautiful location is a convincing reason to be sure they want your attention. Maybe they repeatedly take pictures in an exotic garden, beach, hill, gym center, among others.
Not only do they want to show you how fresh they have become, but how large and happy they are currently living after the breakup.
2. Always view and like your post
It is a strong indication that they are still attracted to you if they stalk you on social media.
Suppose he views your social media posts and stories consistently, likes, or reacts to them when they are being posted. He may decide to comment ordinarily with emoji or no comment at all.
Commenting might want to make him appear desperate or sound pleasing to want you back.
3. They posts familiar jokes and memorable discussions
Suppose personal jokes, stories he has shared with you, a private event he has, or his childhood memories you know about still find a way to be part of his social media post.
In that case, he most definitely wants you to relate those stories and make you travel in time you have had together.
4. They post things that attract you
For somebody who has spent months or years with you before the breakup, they will surely understand your passion, likes, dislikes, food preference, and favorite dress, among others.
If you see any of this constantly on his timeline, it is a clue to know they are trying to get your attention.
5. He has not changed his relationship status on Facebook
Getting into a relationship can be exhilarating, and the joy can easily make people change their relationship status from single to “in a relationship” on social media.
After the breakup, they are expected to switch to single to indicate they have written you off and have their chances open for new relationships.
For somebody who has moved on will surely do that to make a new beginning for a new search.
Leaving the relationship status as “in a relationship” may indicate that he is still in the nostalgia of either moving on or staying around.
6. They post random people on their timelines
Yes, as earlier said, your ex trying to get your attention may not only be for them to want you back in their life.
They may decide to post a random picture of the opposite sex, make hot captions about them, write a romantic poem, and be more subtle in discussing relationship issues.
All these make you feel guilty and feel as if you are losing them to another person.
Now that you are aware and convinced they are posting on social media to play with your mind. How can you stop them?
Again, be convinced you are done with him. If you are still open to considering settlement, the following discussion about moving on isn’t for you.
Firstly, out of sight is out of mind. If you are not seeing and reading things about them, your obsession with them will gradually fade.
Try to make yourself inaccessible to their social media timeline.
Unfollow and block them across all the social media platforms.
Secondly, disengage from asking about them from mutual friends and acquaintances. Neither must you allow them to update you about their whereabouts.
Lastly, work on yourself and use the single period to make necessary changes to things that probably cost you your previous relationship before venturing into a new one.
Raise your standard and read to widen your knowledge. Besides, learn from past mistakes and set goals to meet up with before stepping into another relationship.