Why Is My Ex Posting So Much On Social Media

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Written By Alexis

Alexis has 7 years of experience as a relationship therapist, a degree in psychology, and a deep personal understanding of human relationships.

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why is my ex posting so much on social media

Love is sweet when it becomes a bond between two grown adults coming together to form a relationship and having the mindset of being a potential couple.

But along the way, things aren’t what we thought they could be.

After a breakup, you might suddenly notice a regular and consistent posting on social media from your ex; you may wonder why is my ex posting so much on social media.

Misunderstanding is inevitable in everyday life, as it could be between two aspiring couples. Things may fall apart and be irreparable, and the last resort could be a breakup.

The aftermath of a breakup can be confusing. Every act of your ex becomes sensitive and penetrating. It is typical for you to be curious about how your ex is faring and coping after the breakup and vice-versa.

You unknowingly become a stalker, even though not for wanting them back but probably for knowing how well they are coping without you.

Now you are both apart, and having frequent and flexible communication is now close to impossible. However, social media remains the best tool to measure and understand how well your ex is doing.

Generally, whether or not they still have an attraction for you, or they have moved on to another relationship, feel remorseful of the breakup, or still see you as betraying the relationship, you can filter all these through their social media post.

Fundamentally, a breakup largely determines and answers why you think your ex has changed in the ways he flirts on social media after the split.

If your ex flirts on social media on an average day, you’re not expected to be bothered about his post on social media after the breakup.

Is your ex posting too much after the breakup? Or has that been his norm since you’ve known him?

Have the kinds of stuff he used to post recently changed? Does the post seem directional to you or relatable to relationship issues?

You are still in pain from seeing your ex making fun of the breakup and indirectly rubbing it to your face, hurting your feelings.

Your ex is posting too often on social media for many reasons.


RELATED: Is My Ex Trying To Get My Attention On Social Media


Here are a few salient reasons for the question of why is my ex posting so much on social media

1. He/She feels empty

Your ex’s sudden consistent posts on social media can be because they are grieving about their incompetence to make the relationship work, so they want companionship and engagement to get back on their feet.

Your ex may be grieving due to the anger, denial, depression, and frustration caused by the breakup. If your ex is the cause of the separation or it’s out of mutual understanding, they may still feel empty because of the dilemma of making the wrong decision.

Looking for a way to get themselves engaged can make them stay online more than necessary and post so much more than usual.

2. To boost self-confidence and self-esteem

Your ex probably posts so much on social media to boost his self-esteem for a relationship that broke up out of his low self-esteem.

Suppose your ex is an introvert who lacks the confidence to make himself clear in public or is someone who hardly opens up to people or finds it difficult to engage in lengthy conversations online and offline.

He might want to build on himself before venturing into another relationship or seeking reconciliation between you.

He is unusually making intelligent posts for engagement, posting funny memes for people to see the funny side of him, or discussing socio-political trending issues to have his self-esteem retraced.

3. Moving on to the next catch

After breaking up, most people post to social media to move on and search for another partner.

They may post romantic stuff to attract the opposite sex’s attention. Your ex probably posts so much on social media to rebrand himself for another romantic challenge and move on entirely to another relationship.

4. To gain control of the breakup

Many people can break up deliberately and still rub it over your face intentionally.

They may be posting so much on social media to make you feel guilty and remorseful about the relationship or make you feel bitter and let your guilty conscience bite you.

Your ex may be posting a random girl or guy as a friend with a romantic and erotic caption for you to feel bad and jealous to have them back.


ALSO READ: Can A Relationship Work After A Breakup? Find Out


5. To alleviate their guilt

A relationship that breaks up out of mutual understanding or from your ex’s incompetent attitude will make them feel guilty and suffer from a guilty conscience.

He might make social media his comfort zone in moving on and not giving enough thought to the breakup.

6. To seek your attention

Do you even know why your ex is still seeking your attention after you have both parted ways? It is ironic to say.

Your ex is still trying to get your attention from their sudden posting to attract you. But think of it, you are probably their priority when your love and attraction are hot and exciting. You are the person they easily relate to before the relationship goes sour.

The memory of you both having a night walk together, the crazy sex and naughty talks, attending parties, and many other romantic affairs cannot easily be snuffed out after the breakup.

With this, there is a high chance of craving your attention, but maybe as mere friends.

Maybe, your sudden ex posting on social media is close to having the intention of getting you back in their life but doesn’t know how to settle the rift with you.

Using social media to grab your attention may be the only way they know best. The content they post will differ from what they used to when they want your attention.

In essence, they might be seeking your attention to make them feel loved and accepted again or to let you see how well they are doing after the breakup without you.

How do you know whether your ex is seeking your attention or merely using social media to escape boredom? You may be asking:

Is he trying to get my attention on social media

He may have left your world, but he is still ghosting you in the online sphere.

He might have stopped contacting you from all communication forms, but he does not stop coming your way online. Is he intentionally doing this to have your attention, or are you just overreacting to the aftermath of the breakup?

Of all the reasons we stated earlier about why is my ex posting so much on social media, some of the reasons may get to you with time if you don’t have tough skin.

It can be agonizing to be in such a dilemma and devise what all those signs mean.

But why are you still worried about them and their feelings about you? You are probably not convinced enough to let them go.

It is not subtlety to say you both want each other attention. The feeling you had for them may not have faded entirely, but for any reason, not convinced yet.

Do not think they are trying to get your attention until you have studied their unusual social media habit and mastered some strange signs to arrive at your conclusion.

Here are the signs you can rely genuinely on that he wants your attention and engagement on social media after the breakup


ALSO READ: Why Do I Still Think About My Ex When I Have Someone New


Signs your ex is trying to get your attention on social media

Before delving into that, be aware that trying to get your attention may not be because they desire to get you back into their lives or want to be in an ordinary friendship relationship with you.

Instead, they may be using the post to make you feel sad about the incident, make you feel guilty, or fake that they are doing better without you.

That being said, some signs exhibit he is badly in need of your attention for any of the stated reasons.

1. They post more selfies and pictures in fascinating locations

Most people don’t love taking pictures except on special occasions. If your ex suddenly turns into a selfie-and-picture freak, they are most likely doing that to let you see the new beauty and attraction in them.

However, if they made a post in a more beautiful location, It might be a convincing reason to be sure they want your attention. Maybe they repeatedly take pictures in an exotic garden, beach, hill, or gym center, among others.

They want to show you how fresh they have become and how large and happy they are living after the breakup.

2. Always view and like your post

It strongly indicates they are still attracted to you if they stalk you on social media.

Suppose they view your social media posts and stories consistently, like them, or react to them when posted. He may decide to comment ordinarily with emojis or no comment at all.

Commenting may project them as desperate or sound pleasing to want you back.

3. They post familiar jokes and memorable discussions

Suppose personal jokes, stories he has shared with you, a private event he has, or his childhood memories you know about still find a way to be part of his social media post.

In that case, he most definitely wants you to relate those stories and make you travel in the time you have had together.

4. They post things that attract you

Your ex, who has spent months or years with you before the breakup, will surely understand your passion, likes, dislikes, food preferences, and favorite dress, among others.

If you see any of this constantly on his timeline, it is a clue to know they are trying to get your attention.

5. They have not changed their relationship status on Facebook

Getting into a relationship can be exhilarating, and the joy can easily make people change their relationship status from single to “in a relationship” on social media.

After the breakup, they are expected to switch to single to indicate they have written you off and have their chances open for new relationships.

Somebody who has moved on will surely do that to make a new beginning for a new search.

Leaving the relationship status as “in a relationship” may indicate that he is still nostalgic about moving on or staying around.

6. They post random people on their timelines

Yes, as earlier said, your ex trying to get your attention may not only be for them to want you back in their life.

They may decide to post a random picture of the opposite sex, make hot captions about them, write a romantic poem, and be more subtle in discussing relationship issues.

All these make you feel guilty and feel like you are losing them to another person.

Now that you are aware and convinced they are posting on social media to play with your mind. How can you stop them?


RELATED: How To Stop Loving Someone Who Hurt You


Again, be convinced you are done with him. If you are still open to considering settlement, the following discussion about moving on isn’t for you.

Firstly, out of sight is out of mind. If you do not see and read things about them, your obsession with them will gradually fade.

Try to make yourself inaccessible to their social media timeline.

Unfollow and block them across all social media platforms.

Secondly, disengage from asking about them from mutual friends and acquaintances. Neither must you allow them to update you about their whereabouts.

Lastly, work on yourself and use the single period to make necessary changes to things that probably cost you your previous relationship before venturing into a new one.

Raise your standard and read to widen your knowledge. Besides, learn from past mistakes and set goals to meet up with before stepping into another relationship.

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